One of my little pet peeves is when people do something thinking they're being nice or helpful, but you can kind of tell that they're more interested in looking nice than actually being nice.
And I don't mean when someone genuinely tries to help and it doesn't quite work out. That happens. I think the intention matters a lot.
I'm talking about those moments when you can just... tell.
The tone, the timing, the way they do something. Sometimes there's this feeling that they're performing kindness a little bit. Like they want you to notice that they're being nice.
And honestly, I think people are usually much more perceptive than we give them credit for. 😂
But I don't think this bothers me because I expect everyone to be perfectly selfless or genuinely kind all the time. If anything, it has made me appreciate genuine kindness more.
The people who help without making a big deal about it.
The people who remember little things about you.
The people who do something nice and don't seem to need anything back from it even recognition.
I think those are the kinds of things that stick with me.
Maybe that's why performative kindness feels so different. When someone is genuinely kind, you don't really have to think about whether they're being sincere. You just feel it.
And I think that's something I want to be better at too.
Not being seen as a nice person.
Just being thoughtful when I can.
Helping when I can.
Doing little things for people without needing them to notice.
I guess I just really like kindness that doesn't need an audience.